the christmas party.

i have to write something good here. i had a horrible night and the only thing that can make it worthwile is some sort of epiphany or insight. i guess we always have the potential to disappoint oursleves. there's no guarantee things will get better, in fact, they're more likely to stay the same or get slightly worse. after you realize you love something it has already become something different. it's easy to look back and say none of it was worth it. not even the beautiful moments.