thinking differently.

if life feels like a punishment, it's safe to assume you should be doing something differently. when you hesitate at dancing publicly for mere existence, then there is something holding you back. take notes on living from the people you think have done well. if you can't find them, perhaps you need to reevaluate your understanding of life. being successful and making a living is becoming a sort of functional robot that performs certain tasks repetitively and without err. anything can become a habit. i'd just rather have mine be making love and smelling flowers. sunsets surrounded by horizons of endless ocean might be nice, maybe it would get old. depends on the company. desperate for friends, we find ourselves reaching out to those we might not otherwise reach out to. everything is circumstantial. even our existence is based on the circumstances that caused our parents' coital embrace, all the emotional factors, all economical factors, all social ideas pressed on. things could have just as easily turned out different. somehow i feel it couldn't be all that different.