i like to go out and have fun

a while back a friend of mine was trying to hook me up with a friend of hers. she said things like,

"you'd be good for each other. she likes to do things, the way you do."

what she meant was, i like to go out and have fun, which apparently not everyone likes to do. the reason me and this girl even came up as a possibility was because i got drunk and asked her for her number after chatting with her most of the night when we bailed on a party which neither of us were comfortable at. i probably never intended to call her, it just seemed like the thing to do. the truth was at the time i had just gotten out of a relationship i didn't want to get out of. i guess i was trying to force something to happen. so i called her, or she might have even called me, it doesn't matter. we made a plan to go out one night.

so i went over to her apartment where her surprisingly dorky roommates were watching tv. i say surprisingly, because i didn't know what to expect from this girl, because she's completely ordinary. not unattractive, but plain upon first sight. the friend i met her through wasn't, which is why i figured there was a potential, for something. so we left her apartment and went to this movie. neither of us knew anything about it and it turned out to be a really graphic sexual and violent tarantino-esque film, which i like, but made for an awkward first date scenario. so we decided to leave and went to my apartment where we called a cab to take us to this bar for salsa dancing. some friends of hers were supposed to be there.

so we went to this bar and met up with her friends, but mostly it was just us. this was before i knew how to salsa dance and though i knew how to swing dance, its not quite the same. she didn't know either, so we kind of watched others, stole moves, and shook our hips real dramatic. we didn't drink anything except water, dancing is dehydrating if you do it right, or wrong. after last call and the lights came on we left the bar and walked back. we shared memories and thoughts as we walked past the night lit buildings and closed stores. i took her to her apartment building and said goodnight.

we hung out on and off for the next several days. one night i called her to do something, i was shooting pool with some people at the time and told her i'd give her a call when i got back to my apartment. upon arrival at my apartment i called her, but she didn't answer. i didn't leave a message, probably because i was tired and just going to bed anyways, or because i hate explaining myself spontaneously to machines. so i just went to bed. i called her the next afternoon to do something before i left town for the weekend. she didn't call back. on the bus out of town i received a voice message from her, it went something like,

"hi.. i'd like to do something, but.. what the heck. you said you would call me back and you didn't. i mean, what am i supposed to think. i fell asleep by myself on the couch. i'd like to do something, but not if i can't count on you."

i didn't call her back.