another year passes and everything still feels like the direction of down.

nothing to capture interest, nothing but fake smiles. tired hopeless mornings and everything's close enough to the same forever and ever ad infinum. cycles of pleasure and discomfort that all blur into a feeling of basic regret. i've probably been unhappy/depressed more than 70% of my self-aware life. this is not a cry for help, just a statistic. for all i know this might be below average. numbers did us all in.